wishmaker

[animeking15]

alright this is a game when someone makes a wish and the next person makes a twist on it to make it useless.

and if what I said was too confusing here is what I mean


1. The first person posts a wish.

2. The second poster grants the first wish, but with a twist so the granted wish is useless. They then wish for something of thier own.

Ex:
Poster #1: I wish I had a million dollars.

Poster #2: Granted, but you get it in pennies.


alrite I'll go first, I wish I had a mansion

[aznkangaroo3]

Granted, but it is a doll mansion

I wish I had a kangaroo farm

[Seijuro]

granted theyd all be stuffed

i wish the author of air gear would give this site a special translated pre released copy cause that whole waiting a week really sucks.

[Kumo2002]

Granted but it is translated into a language nobody has ever heard or seen before


I wish for a better job

[animeking15]

granted its an elephant waste cleaner

i wish ss had a new RAW scanner

[fan118]

granted but the person sends you the wrong scans.

i wish that i had the ability to read air gear chapters from the future.

[Jarnt]

Granted but the letters are made with invisible ink

I wish for an unlimited supply of pie

[Flonne]

Granted! but its Aluminium Pies used in WW2 when America was out of atom bombs to drop on ppl.

I wish for everyone to fall in love with the person right next to them!

[meanlilkitty]

Granted, but everyone's sitting by their mom atm.

I wish I had a pony.

[smoosh]

Granted. But its a toy pony.

i wish for a new computer.

[Babyface]

Granted but it doesn't have a power cable

I wish for world peace

[jimmy123]

granted, except u hear the words 'world peace' appear constantly in beauty pageants...

i wish that i'm in an alternate universe :D

[animeking15]

granted its a universe of Mankillers

I wish I could get a car

[Jarnt]

Granted but it only has 1 wheel

i wish for a magic turkey

[animeking15]

granted but it can only destroy the user

I wish I was King of the Universe

[fan118]

granted but you become the king of a universe in an alternate dimention.

i wish for a new phone.

[animeking15]

granted but it doesnt work

i wish I had a dog

[Jarnt]

Granted but it got eaten by a cat the next day

i wish for large pepperoni pizza

[thenecessity]

Granted but you cannot eat it.

i wish school was easier

[animeking15]

granted but you cant leave


I wish I had a sword

[Jarnt]

Granted but its made of chocolate

I wish i had a froggy

[Leave]

Granted, but it'd be taken for dissection.

I wish I had Fender Telecaster.

[Jakkin]

Granted but it's in the form of a lump of toothpicks.

I wish for a chance to meet Hugh Laurie...

Gotta love House.

[Nie]

Granted but its an impersonator

I wish i had a super fast car

[Kumo2002]

Granted....but it is scaled down to toy size

I wish i had my couch and loveseat back....>.<

[zxcvbn]

Granted but they've got dog poop all over them.

I wish I had a billion $.

[animeking15]

granted but its monopoly money

I wish I had a better computer

[Jakkin]

granted but its monopoly money

I wish I had a better computer

Granted... but it is infected with a netbus trojan virus. And is watched by the NSA, CIA, and FBI for suspension of pedophilia.

I wish for a strawberry candy-cane.

[Nie]

Granted but its old and stale and tastes like dog throw up.

I wish i could play an instrument

[Death]

Granted, but it is the recorder.

[animeking15]

Death you never wished for anythin

[SpitFire]

just go on...
well... i wish i have AT's with Regalia..^^

[animeking15]

granted but thier made of styrofoam

I wish I could be a superhero

[p4091a]

granted but your powers are only avaliable to you on the 29 of Feburary

i wish i would win lottery

[animeking15]

granted but you only win a dollar

I wish I had pyrokinesis

[p4091a]

lawl. i still get a dollar! *happy*

granted but u'd need five kilos of fuel to a start a fire the size of one made by a matchstick.

I want to.... cosplay next year =D

[zxcvbn]

Granted...but you cosplay as some bizarre gay bondage fetishist!

I wish I were immortal.

[p4091a]

O.o!

Granted but you have to kill yourself first

I wish I would be a top scholar

[saniya]

granted but only in your dreams:P

i wish i could be immortal..

[animeking15]

granted but in the process you become paralyzed

I wish I had magic powers

[p4091a]

granted but go sniff hallucinogens while you're at it.

I wish my com was faster.

[Ice Dragon]

granted, but your comp runs so fast that it explodes.

I wish that AT were real.

[saniya]

granted but they are toy ATS:P
i wish i could actually get all those things tht i dream for:P

[Ice Dragon]

granted, but they all land on your head killing you.

I wish that someone will come up with a good wish.

[p4091a]

granted, but here.

i wish my neighbour's dog would stop barking

[dabid]

granted, but then ur mum starts barking

i wish i was a uber mod

[Nie]

granted, but your only mod of yourself.

i wish it would snow.

[dabid]

wish granted, but it snow's in north decoda
i wish i made of cheese

[Ice Dragon]

Granted, but you get eaten by rats.

I wish that the next ch. of Air Gear is translated into engish.

[Jakkin]

Granted, but you get eaten by rats.

I wish that the next ch. of Air Gear is translated into engish.

Granted but it's all poorly translated, with large erroneous spelling and grammatical errors, and it doesn't make any sense.

I wish that people would stop wishing things, especially the people that wish for things to wish things simply to wish them that they could think of better a wishful thinking.

[UF-demon]

Granted, but you find a genie and he gives us more wishes

I wish for cheese that is actually chocolate in disguise.

[sazo]

the chocolate melts all over the cheese disquise



i wish i had a new keyboard

[Selierei]

Granted, but each key will be a spike that will impale your hand should you attempt to type on it, and if you attempt to merely touch it, your hand will stick to it like glue. Super glue. O_o

I wish for an Emo Farm, where I can raise a pack of wild emos and milk them, selling some of it and turning the rest into cheese, not to mention slaughtering the older/useless ones, and selling Emo Meat.

[EpikLulz]

Granted but they'd all would have cut their wrists and died under market weight so you couldn't milk or sell them.

I wish that I was bi-sexual

[Tanbird]

granted but you're on an island by yourself.

I wish I had a human zoo.

[Nie]

granted but they are all 1inch tall

I wish i had a liger

[Dokuro]

granted but its chronically depressed

i wish for the means to go anywhere in the world free of charge

[tonember]

GRANTED, but you live on the moon!

I wish I had a dog!

[rasenshuriken]

granted but the ras thinks of something so unbelievably clever to make that wish useless

I wish i had a giant stuffed whale plushie

[tonember]

GRANTED, but it's already in pieces!

I wish I had a katana!

[Abel]

Granted, but it's really a "cat and a..." stuck together (yes I know I suck at this game)

I wish I had 37 Mexican people for an elaborate prank.

[MellowMind]

I wish I had 37 Mexican people for an elaborate prank.

Granted, the elaborate prank is put into practice, and results in the injury of 1 or more of your Mexican assistants. You are sued.

I wish I could salsa dance.

[burnedalive]

Granted, but you end up married with a controlling b**** because of it.

I wish I had some nukes.

[MellowMind]

You are arrested by your resident national government for sedition and terrorism. Your nukes are secretly confiscated by the American government. Thanks a lot; we really, truly appreciate it.

I wish my wish wouldn't go wrong.

[Abel]

Granted, but it was fairly pointless wish in all fairness

I wish I Had a fully functining Hula Hoop!

[MellowMind]

It fully functions in a completely different direction. It never loved you.

I wish I had lots and lots of money, which wasn't obtained in an illegal way.

[rasenshuriken]

granted but they're Zimbabwean dollars :/

I wish i had a pony. Those ones on "My Little Pony". ._.

[Abel]

Granted but it runs/flies away...

I wish I had a Hula Hoop that loves me...

[burnedalive]

Granted, but it loves you to death.

I wish dragons were real.

[Jakkin]

Granted but they are only a centimeter big, and explode after three seconds of being alive.

I wish I had some AAA batteries...

[MellowMind]

They are dead, non-rechargeable batteries.

I wish I had an unlimited supply of incriminating photos of political officials, so that I may blackmail them into doing whatever I say.

[Ikki2107]

granted, but the photos are in color negitve and ripped upped in pieces.

i wish i had a automatic pie maker that works and will never break down

[MellowMind]

It is stolen by a foreign terrorist regime which uses it to develop an *gasp*

:666:ANTI-PIE LAZER:666:

Thanks, you've doomed the world.

I wish I had secret dominion over a small out-of-the-way government, using its current leader as a figure-head in my master plan.

[Ikki2107]

granted but the tip is they are a curropt party who is found out and gets impeached and later hunted down by the pie lazer terriost

i wish i could fly by wearing speacial shoes that will alays work to my exact feet size. and i could breathe in the sky when high high up.

[MellowMind]

Granted, but then you fly just a little to high up. You burn up in the Earth's atmosphere.

I wish I was a revolutionary, successfully turning the whole world's population to a new, peaceful way of thinking, bringing on a new era of world peace.

[chuck-d2041]

granted but the 1st amendment has been revoked

i wish i was immortal

[Ikki2107]

Granted-but u grow very old and become a vegtable state. every u know and love is died.

I wish i had a fish.

[chuck-d2041]

granted but that fish is a shark and it eats u

i wish i had infinant wisdom

[Ikki2107]

granted-ur brain gets so big that it explodes and u die.

i wish i lived in a world where i was the only guy and nothing but girls who loved me and wanted to be with me MWHAHAHA.

[chuck-d2041]

granted but they'er all 70 years old

i wish i had a car

[Ikki2107]

granted but it is teared up and beaten down.

i wish i had good no spoiling food.

[burnedalive]

granted but it doesn't taste good to you.

I wish I had a nuke in a place where the government couldn't find it and has all the safety measures to not get me killed by it.

[MellowMind]

Granted, instead of a the U.S. government getting a hold of it, it is instead found by an extremist terrorist regime (not a government) bent on the collection and disarmament of all the world's nukes. They storm your house and assassinate you before stealing the nuke. They take the nuke to another nuke-bearing country and attempt to permanently disarm it. The disarmament attempt goes awry and the resulting nuclear explosion kills hundreds of thousands of people, including that country's leaders. In the resulting revolutionary disarray, the U.S. government manages to recover all of that country's hundreds, if not thousands, of nukes.

We couldn't be more thankful; you deserve a medal.

I wish I could think at three times the speed I do now

[Ikki2107]

u think so fast u se eur own death and try to avoid it but die even worst death
i wish i have unlimetted amount of anime

[burnedalive]

granted, but the rest of the anime that come out suck and you don't want to watch them.

I wish I was ruler of a country.

[MellowMind]

AWWWWW. No more nukes. That was getting fun.:p

Granted, but you are assassinated and usurped by your closest advisor.

I wish I could recall every memory I've ever had.

[burnedalive]

You recall every memory you had, even the ones about a pedophilic uncle and aunt. You then commit suicide.

I wish I had 3 more wishes.

[Ikki2107]

u three mor ewhises was granted but already used so they didn work

i wishi was better on piano

[chuck-d2041]

granted but your fingers will be broken as a result

is i was little bit taller

[MellowMind]

Granted, but you hyper-extend a disk during the transformation. I hope you love your newfound back-problems.

I wish I knew who my soulmate was.

[chuck-d2041]

granted but that person reflects all ur flaws and bad habits

i wish i had my own miltimillion dollar company that was safe from lawsuit bankruptancy and all other negative effects of the stock market

[Ikki2107]

granted but a terriost blows it up and all ur money
i wish i had more yuri friends lol ^.^

[chuck-d2041]

granted but like i said before they all 70 years old

i wish a had the cure for aids

[MellowMind]

granted, but but it strengthens all other viral diseases one hundred fold. Have fun with your debilitating, paralyzing cold.

I wish everyone was always happy.

[Ikki2107]

granted but they get so bored they commit sucide.

i wish i had hentai. lol ^.^ jp

[MellowMind]

Granted, but they feature all the fetishes and paraphilias that disgust you.

I wish I was a circle

[Ikki2107]

granted u are a pice of paper

i wish i was a cube...a big cube

[MellowMind]

Granted, but you are a weighted companion cube, which is loved, but ultimately destroyed in furnace.

I wish I could understand all languages

[Ikki2107]

You learn so many launges that ur head expoledes from over knowing stuff or something like that lol.

I wish i knew how to spell everything...or anything right lol

[Blue Feathers]

Granted, but you lose the power to pronounce words. x3

I wish I was the greatest artist known to man!

[MellowMind]

Granted, but all the women in the world think you're a horrible artist.

I wish that I could transform into an unassuming inanimate object whenever I wanted to.

[chuck-d2041]

granted but you get dropped into a volcano

i wish xbox live was free

[Ikki2107]

granted but a whole bunch of noobs take over Call Of Duty 5 and Guitar World Tour and not to metion Rockband 2.

I wish was A-Rank in the RP fourms.

[chuck-d2041]

granted but right after your accont gets deleted

i wish this was all a dream

[MellowMind]

Granted, but you wake up into a living Hell

I wish everybody in the world would switch to the opposite gender for a day.

[burnedalive]

granted, but in a turn of events, everyone becomes hermaphrodites instead.


I wish I had some more nukes that are mine and mine alone, that can't kill me.

[MellowMind]

*twiddles with evil mustache*
Muahahahahahahahahahaha. It seems that you have provided me with yet another nuke wish to ruin.

Granted, you enjoy your nukes, for a while. However, after a while, people begin to find out about your nukes. Newspapers run articles featuring you and your wonderful nukes; you become famous for being "that guy with the nukes". However, people begin to question your intentions with them. For one reason or another, your home country's government completely sanctions your ownership of the nukes, so nobody in power can do anything about it. But people begin protesting your ownership of the atomic bombs, in front of your house. Eventually, your reputation becomes so bad that people tepee your house, destroy your property, and verbally assault you.

One day, while walking down the street, a mob of angry people begin to surround you. They all begin pushing you from one side and another, teasing you and yelling at you. Eventually, punches fly, and, even though you put up a valiant fight, it proves futile and you are lynched. Your dead beaten corpse is left in the middle of the street. It is listed as homicide by lynching, but nobody is convicted due to lack of interest, and your death goes unavenged. A "will" is found at the scene that renounces the nukes to the U.S. government. Too bad you're a dead, beaten corpse, or we would have thanked you.

I wish that I had delicious cake, which could not be regrettable regardless of the result.

[chuck-d2041]

granted but its xmas fruit cake

i wish i had no worries

[MellowMind]

Granted, but, due to the fact that you have no worries, you really don't worry about anything. You are found dead not three or four days later, with a contented smile on your face, but a severely dehydrated body.

I wish I will one day become a successful billionaire

[Abel]

Granted but it's monopoly money

I wish I had a fully functioning ping pong ball....

[MellowMind]

Granted, but you do not have a paddle. Feeling unsatisfied, your ping pong ball runs away with a whoring softball.

I wish I no longer needed to buy anything, because everything I'll ever need will be given to me.

[chuck-d2041]

granted but they only give you crap

i wish any school past junior year was opional

[MellowMind]

Granted, but you'll never find a profitable job.

I wish Marxism worked.

[Ikki2107]

Granted but everybody dies from WW3

I wish i had some good music.

[chuck-d2041]

granted but youre deaf

i wish i was immune to any negative effects of any wishes that i might make in the future

[MellowMind]

Granted, but your idea of "negative" is different from everyone else. Enjoy your *coughruinedcough* fulfilled wishes

I wish I was an excellent inventor

[chuck-d2041]

granted but all your inventions turn on you and try to kill you(i like the .hack games)

i wish street racing was legal

[Ikki2107]

Granted but you get him by ten cars ina row then ran over by a semi truck

i wish i had all of the G.U. series

[rasenshuriken]

granted but G.U. stands for Gentleman's Underwear [TM]

i wish i could see a minute into the future

[chuck-d2041]

granted but you see something you shouldnt have and it makes you go blind

i wish could afford a years subscription to xbox live

[MellowMind]

Granted, you can afford it, but you are not allowed to spend the money.

I wish I had the ability to travel through time, using a completely reliable time-traveling DeLorian DMC-12.

[Ikki2107]

Granted but u get caught in what seemed like the Back To The Future Series

I wish i had a A in German II Class.

[MellowMind]

Granted, but now you get to know what several German visitors say about you in German.

I wish I could completely control my every emotion.

[chuck-d2041]

granted but you lose control of your bodily function (as in you will piss yourself alot)

i wish a golden ticket

[Ikki2107]

Granted, But Charile shoots you wiht a shotgun killing you and stealing the ticket

I wish i had some more Ramen that was good and never ended or got cold adn wasa beef falvor

[Shiro Emiya]

Granted, but of course your little sister eats it all while you're searching for some darn'd chopsticks.

I wish I had the guts to propose to my older sister's best friend (and of course that she would accept).

[Matara Kiyoshi]

Granted, but she dies of a mysterious disease caused by the engagement ring you give her. The disease goes completely unnoticed until the day of the wedding. The preacher asks her if she'll marry you, but she vomits on your rented tux and her heart implodes.

I wish I had full, exclusive access to a fully-stocked, fully-secured food storage area (I think the term is "larder", but I'm not sure).

[Shiro Emiya]

Granted, but you too, my friend, catch a disease, which makes you puke your sorry guts out whenever you see even a morsel of food.

I wish I had Kilik's bike and the ability to ride it.

[Ikki2107]

Granted but you drown in a tub of water in the middle of the night and puked on by a midget.

I wish i had common sense

[Matara Kiyoshi]

Granted. You suddenly realized that the sensible thing to do would be to be careful what you wish for as you lose all of your other senses in compensation.

I wish I could get all this wax out of my ear.

[MellowMind]

Granted, but inevitably more wax develops in your ear. You spend the rest of your life making a habit of removing the systematically reforming wax in your ear.

I wish I had a date. It's so lonely being single.

[Atrumnieks]

granted but after the 3d date u found that she cheats on u and u try to kill her but didn't sucseed so u hire someone ho does that

i wish i was a fish.

[Ikki2107]

Granted but u get tunred into sushi and eaten by a fat otaku......dang....


I wish i find my lost permet

[chuck-d2041]

granted but you get caught killed cleaned choped up and then cooked but they burn you to a crisp so you get thrown in the garbage

[Matara Kiyoshi]

Up past there- granted, but somebody slashes your tires, siphons all your gas, and commits arson against all of the gas stations within three miles.

I wish I could use magic.

[hooj]

Granted, but every spell you cast irrevocably halves your current IQ

I wish I had another post to read

[Matara Kiyoshi]

Granted. Here it is.

I wish I could have three consequence-free wishes.

[chuck-d2041]

granted but you use them on dumb things

i wish i had an indesturctable vehichle of destruction that couldnt be stolen

[Atrumnieks]

granted but you pushed for fun the self destruct button and died

i wish i had a rubber doll.

[Ikki2107]

granted but it never worked in the first place

i wish i had something to do

[Atrumnieks]

granted and it was watching how the paint dries

i wish i was the wind.

[Ikki2107]

Granted ubt u are the wind coming out of a Fat GUy's Behind....

I wish All good yuri hentai was free......

[Atrumnieks]

granted but u got caught by ur all family mastubating and then they dispose of all ur yuri hentai collection

i wish i had a pussys farm.

[chuck-d2041]

granted but you do something boring

i wish i had my own money

[hooj]

granted, but it's only monopoly money

I wish my favorite manga came out everyday

[Ikki2107]

granted but it go tburn before it got scan or even sold in stores

I wish i had Buger King right now....

[chuck-d2041]

granted but it has mad cow

i wish i was at home right now

[MellowMind]

Granted, but you appear out of nowhere right in front of your family. Word gets out and everybody thinks you are a witch. You are lynched.

I wish I had a pie.

[Atrumnieks]

granted but it's a pie with no filling

i wish i had a tree.

[K-23]

Granted. However, its a 1cm tall miniature.

I wish Pokemon were real.

[Matara Kiyoshi]

Granted, but they're out of control monsters that nearly destroy us all before the nukes do.

I wish I didn't have to go to my classes today.

[K-23]

Granted. But you are forced to go to a Sailor Bubba and Man-Faye convention.

I wish the lounge in my school wasn't so cold...

[chuck-d2041]

granted but the heat in there can be compaired to a volcano

i wish "The New XBOX Experiance" was better

[MellowMind]

Granted it's "better" at annoying you

I wish I had a magic amulet that allowed me to travel through time

[Matara Kiyoshi]

Granted, but it only lets you travel forwards in time and you age accordingly.

I wish I had 20/20 vision.

[burnedalive]

Granted, but you get captured by terrorists right after and get yours eyes pulled out with spoons.

I wish i had nukes that were fully under my control, mine and mine alone and will never hurt me. -_-" I hope that covers all the bases....

[Ikki2107]

Granted but they was all duds that is why it never hurts you

I wish i had some cigs right now....

[Matara Kiyoshi]

Granted. However, it's a brand so toxic that they kill you instantly.

I wish my sister wasn't so greedy.

[burnedalive]

Granted. Her greed disappears but you end up on the street wishing your sister still wanted money.

I wish I have a robotic arm.

[Ikki2107]

granted but u try alchemy and dlow it off.

I wish i knew how to make ATs and the props needed

[chuck-d2041]

granted but Sora steals them from you

i wish assassins creed was on XBOX LIVE

[Atrumnieks]

granted but u don't have money to buy it and ur xbox broke

i wish i could be in anime

[Matara Kiyoshi]

Granted. You're a convicted prisoner in Death Note and your only role is to die a horrible, dramatized death.

I wish the computer lab didn't close early on Friday.

[Atrumnieks]

granted but it's too crowded for u to even get in

i wish i had more time

[Ikki2107]

granted so u have too much time and try to jump off a roff and kill yourself

i wish i ddin't piss my freind off

[MellowMind]

Granted, he pisses you off.

I wish people would just stop forcing their belief systems on me.

[Ikki2107]

granted but then they never talk to you again.

I wish i have fun in tommorows fight and win.

[burnedalive]

granted but both of you become totally paralyzed during the fight, making it a total pointless win.

I wish I had 1000 more wishes to use.

[Atrumnieks]

granted but u don't use them

i wish i could see K1 live

[chuck-d2041]

granted but security wont let would in

i wish my piss could be use as an free renewable resorce

[Bucca]

grante dbut u would have to drink it first
i wish oh great would make a season two

[genesis]

Granted.The author is retired ;-p

i wish to have an AT.

[Bucca]

granted dont kill yourself
i wish i had kazu's hat

[Matara Kiyoshi]

Granted, but Kogarusumaru beats you bloody getting it back for him.

I wish I had a bottle of Mountain Dew.

[chuck-d2041]

granted but its empty

i wish i hadnt done that

[K-23]

Granted! But you are kicked out of the 'Evil' club >: D

I wish for world peace.

[Matara Kiyoshi]

Granted. Everyone's dead.

I wish I had a naginata.

[Atrumnieks]

granted but it's for cosplay

i wish i had sneakers

[HomoSexuAzuu]

Granted but they have evil crabs living in the lining of it. When you put them on, you accept them into your life. They will soon govern your entire life. They will enter your bloodstream by ripping through the flesh of your feet, entering your brain. You will no longer by yourself. You will no longer be in control. You will be, dead.

I wish for better art skills ;_;

[Atrumnieks]

granted but there are some better at it and they beat the crap out of you........if not then u finish learning those skills when u become 88

i wish i would be better

[HomoSexuAzuu]

Better at what? You are now better at failing.

I wish people would shutup about the LHC.

[Atrumnieks]

(at anything) granted but u r the only one who didn't shut up

i wish i could have a chocolate cake made out of paper

[HomoSexuAzuu]

Granted but pyro spy checks it, burning it to a crisp.

But,
This was a triumph.
I'm making a note here:
HUGE SUCCESS.
It's hard to overstate
my satisfaction.
Aperture Science
We do what we must
because we can.
For the good of all of us.
Except the ones who are dead.
But there's no sense crying
over every mistake.
You just keep on trying
till you run out of cake.
And the Science gets done.
And you make a neat gun.
For the people who are
still alive.


I'm not even angry.
I'm being so sincere right now.
Even though you broke my heart.
And killed me.
And tore me to pieces.
And threw every piece into a fire.
As they burned it hurt because
I was so happy for you!
Now these points of data
make a beautiful line.
And we're out of beta.
We're releasing on time.
So I'm GLaD. I got burned.
Think of all the things we learned
for the people who are
still alive.

Go ahead and leave me.
I think i prefer to stay inside.
maybe you'll find someone else
to help you.
maybe Black Mesa...
THAT WAS A JOKE, HA HA, FAT CHANCE.
Anyway this cake is great.
It's so delicious and moist
look at me still talking when theres science to do
when i look out there
it makes me glad I'm not you
i've experiments to run
there is research to be done
on the people who are
still alive.


and believe me I am still alive
I'm doing science and I'm still alive
i feel fantastic and I'm still alive
while your dying ill be still alive
and when your dead i will be still alive
still alive
still alive

;_;

Anywhos, I wish for psychokinesis.

[Matara Kiyoshi]

Granted, but your brain cannot cope with that kind of power and shuts down in self-defense, leaving you in a permanent coma.

I wish my character was C-rank so that I could multitask characters.

[HomoSexuAzuu]

Granted buy Jiro kills joo for no reason whatsoever.

I wish for pyrokinesis.

[Atrumnieks]

(no way i'm reading that all) granted but u die of it, the end of the story.

i wish for a new phone

[HomoSexuAzuu]

Granted, it gives you brain cancer from the microwaves emitting from it.

I wish for a whole coke bottle.

[Atrumnieks]

granted but some bum from out of nowhere steals it and drinks it all

i wish for a back scratcher

[HomoSexuAzuu]

Granted, but it's made out of metal so you rip yourself to pieces trying to scratch yourself.

I wish for pie.

[Atrumnieks]

granted..........but i ate it

i wish i had a magazine to throw it at u

[K-23]

Granted. But it has a picture of Man Faye on the cover, so you collapse and die before you even get the chance to throw it.

I wish I had a new pair of glasses.

[Matara Kiyoshi]

Granted. Two sheets of glass have impaled your heart and skull.

I wish that the person after me won't be able to think of a wish.

[Tieria]

Granted, but you die the second after and the wish before yours is granted to me xD

[Atrumnieks]

hmm......... wish for a glass of water.

[Matara Kiyoshi]

Granted. One glass of water with a tasteless, colorless, smell-less, deadly poison mixed in. (No fun at all, that)

I wish I had the focus to actually work on my comic two days in a row.

[Atrumnieks]

granted but ur brains stop working of not sleeping 2 days straight

wish for a feather of crow

[chuck-d2041]

granted but its covered in crows shit

i wish SEGA didnt charge additional fee aside from the fee you already pay for XBOX LIVE just to play their games online

[Matara Kiyoshi]

Done. They no longer offer that service.

I wish I didn't have such a stagnant personality.

[sirloki]

Granted but now you are clinically insane and live in a padded room and have a jacket where you get to hug yourself alllllll day

I wish i had my own business

[Bucca]

granted but you gou out of buisness the first day
i wish i had simcas thong

[p4091a]

granted, but onigiri'd probably steal it away even before you got to see it. =P

I wish...I could smuggle in a katana into Sg without being caught X.x

[Matara Kiyoshi]

Done. The security is now so lax that you are able to get a katana inside. And the person with the bomb designed to level the entire building can get that in, too.

I wish there was no winter.

[sirloki]

Granted but the world burns up and you die of starvation and dehydration

I wish for world peace :D

[Matara Kiyoshi]

Granted. Everyone's dead. (definitely one of the more versatile answers)

I wish I didn't have to walk three miles both ways to get to school and back.

[chuck-d2041]

granted you walk 10 miles to get to school and back

oh i wish i was a oscer miyer whiner(yeah i spelled it wrong)

[Ikki2107]

granted but u get shot....

i wish i had a full pack of newports

[sirloki]

Granted but they are the one and only newports that are NOT menthol and it is a soft pack

i wish smoking actually made you more healthy

[Matara Kiyoshi]

Granted. But being on fire still hurts like hell.

I wish I had a knife in my hand that caused me to slowly die of bloodloss.

[Atrumnieks]

granted but u got saved by a stranger who has no home so for saving your ass you allowed him to stay at your home.

i wish for a new pack of crisps.

[chuck-d2041]

granted but i still it from you

i wish i they wouldnt ban guns but instead ban the bullets

[sirloki]

Granted but you are shot that same day with an arrow +1 through your eye

i wish i had a estate in Jamacia

[chuck-d2041]

granted but its not in resort jamacia its in stabin jamacia

wish i could hear no evil see no evil and speak all the evil i want

[Atrumnieks]

granted but you're in hell drinking water with the devil...

wish for a cloud.

[Matara Kiyoshi]

Granted. One small cloud of mustard gas has enveloped your head.

I wish I had every Terry Pratchett book that's ever been written.

[sirloki]

Granted but it was just the covers - inside was the Robert Jordan books that he died before he could finish

i wish i had written a book years ago

[The Prodigy of Darkness]

Granted, but it was not a good seller

I wish for another wish.

[Atrumnieks]

granted but someone else used it in your place

wish for a new mouse pad.

[Matara Kiyoshi]

Granted, and the music keeps you up all night, every night (mouse bachelor pad)

I wish I had a full 3 liter bottle of Faygo Sprite

[Ikki2107]

Granted but i shoot them with a sawed off Double barrell shotgun with grip,

I wish me and my firend ddin't die at lvl 20 on Nazi Zombies

[rasenshuriken]

Granted but you died on lvl 10


I wish i could freestyle as good as Tom Green.

[LostWinds]

granted but you'd have 2 look like him

i wish i could shape shift

[Matara Kiyoshi]

Granted, but you have to concentrate on every detail all the time, so the movement that you lose it, you collapse into a mass of atomic building blocks.

I wish that I had a good winter jacket with a zipper that actually worked.

[Ikki2107]

granted but u mess up a trick and die.

i wish i could free run really good.

[sirloki]

Granted but you fall into a hole filled with broken glass and you become massivly disfigured

I wish i had more motivation

[Atrumnieks]

granted but your motivated in the wrong direction

wish i could kick my teachers bottom.

[Ikki2107]

grantd but u get expelled then arrested for assult and batery.

[chuck-d2041]

granted but your teacher kicks your ass

i wish xbox live didnt lag so much

[The Prodigy of Darkness]

Granted, but if you play it, it lags more.

I wish that someone wished a wish.

[Atrumnieks]

granted but you wished instead of that someone.

wish i could treat you all with drinks.

[chuck-d2041]

granted but you dont get one

i wish i could do no evil

[Matara Kiyoshi]

Granted. You are in a permanent coma on alien life support that will keep you alive forever, so you can do nothing (and therefore no evil)

I wish I could teleport to any location that I've been to instantaneously whenever I want.

[iMeh]

Granted. But whenever you use your teleporting powers, you need to lick the nipples of the person you most hate.

I wish I could fire a lasor.

[sirloki]

Granted but it was aimed at your head at the time

I wish i had not lost my contacts with the various freindly females in my area that enjoyed sleeping over at times.

[Atrumnieks]

granted but they have moved away from your area so even if you have contacts with them they are too far away to have sleepover.

[chuck-d2041]

what...no wish

i wish my school didnt suck so much

[regalia00]

Granted, your school will be the best school the best in the school that sucks category.

I wish that I have a wish...

[iMeh]

Granted. But that wish has to be granted and only your dog can use it. If not used within 5 seconds you die. Too late.

[sirloki]

hmmmm more wishyness

I wish i had a maid cleaning my .. .. apartment ya

[chuck-d2041]

granted but shes 85 years old and there a faint smell of rotten..:gasp:..fish coming from her

i wish i had T-pains singing machine

[iMeh]

oops, didn't post a wish srry loki

Granted. You have Thong Pains singing machine

I wish I had a ultrasuperduperelectromagnetic wave

[Atrumnieks]

granted but now your stuck on a block of metal

wish i had a block of metal on which would be stuck iMeh with his ultrasuperduperelectromagnetic wave.

[Ikki2107]

granted but u pull in a semi-truck and get crushed to death

i wish i watched roots befor i played G.U.

[rasenshuriken]

granted but they were tree roots.

i wish i had a full wallet.

[Atrumnieks]

granted its full of paper.

i wish i have new pants.

[sirloki]

Granted but they are 2 sizes too small and you lose body parts as a result of wearing them.

i wish i could have an hour long conversation with myself at age 13

[chuck-d2041]

granted but its a very very very unintelligent conversation

wish i the u-phone(lets see where this goes)

[Matara Kiyoshi]

Granted. You now own an i-phone As an extra bonus, you get turned into an short wrinkly green creature with pointy ears and get hounded by millions of Star Wars fans.

[chuck-d2041]

yes i finally get to kick ass like yoda

i wish i the show yu-gi-oh didnt make the card game yu-gi-oh suck

[iMeh]

Granted. Instead they make Rape-ChuckD-Oh.

I wish I had a mozzarella stick

[sirloki]

Granted but i am not going to say where they stuck it

I wish i had a huge bottle of sake